12.04.2008

Chapter 17: TROUBLE IN TOYLAND

(Episode 5)

Just inside the door, the Artful Dodger is fishing for suckers while the store proprietor, Little Old Cratchett, keeps an eye on the boy's every move. Cratchett had seen every kind of pint-sized con man and sleight-of-hand artist in the book. In fact, he's been one.

Fagan is helping Toots with a block tower.

Toots sees Mitzi just then.

"Daddy, look, it's her! She found us!"

He looks up. "Oh, well, hello again."

"You!" Mitzi's voice shakes with anger and indignation and fury, and also because she's very mad. "Give me back my money!

"I beg your pardon?"

"Don't you go begging my pardon, you...you beggar, you thief!"

Fagan sighs. "Why is it that everytime I see you it's embarrassing? Is it just me?"

Mitzi exclaims, "Somebody call the police! Don't let them get away. That man and these children are pickpockets! They stole all my earthly savings!"

Fortunately, the polite young policeman is just around the corner at the donut shop. Before the call is even completed he rushes through the door.

"Officer, thank goodness you're here!"

"Oh, it's you again! Have you sobered up a bit, ma'am?"

Mitzi ignores that question, for of course he'll have to believe her now. She's caught them--well, at least one of them--sticky handed, and where there is one sticky hand, there are others not far behind. "Officer, I found the pickpockets!"

"Wonderful...oh, hi, Detective. Are you on this case?"

"I think I'm in it."

"There he is, the head pick..."

"...detective? Who's a detective? You know him?"

"Not well. We're casual acquaintances, mostly through work, although we have shared a donut or two. Then there was that time...Hey, Lieutenant, you remember that time? When the whole bunch of us went out after work and we all had maybe a little bit too much of the funny juice and you took off...."

"Now is not the time, Jerry."

"Oh, ri-ight. Hey, are these the urchins? They look like kids to me. Hey guys, want a donut?"

"But...okay, now I feel like a fool...So...if they're not pickpockets...what happened to my wallet?"

Rrring, ringggg. "Phew. Saved by the phone. Excuse me, I'll just let the two of you catch up on old times while I go off here and talk."

"Hi, Sharon. What's that? You found...where?" Mitzi lowers her voice. "Oh dear, I must have left it there when I was putting away my tips. What a relief. I thought it had been stolen. Thank you for calling me. I'll be right there to get it."

She hastily bids adieu. "Okay, I think I'll be going now. Just go back to what you all were doing--sharing happy moments, making Christmas memories, creating good will toward plastickind. Pretend I wasn't here."

"Or whatever."

Mitzi is gone, but in her haste, she has left something behind. Poor Mitzi. She seems to be very absent-minded these days."