3.03.2009

CHAPTER 29: STILL BEHIND THE SCENES

(Episode 8)

There is so much going on behind the scenes in Plasticopia. It takes a lot of work and skill in many different fields to bring each episode to our audience. Yesterday we talked to some girls in Wardrobe. Today we're going to travel all the way across the table to Carpentry, where they build the wonderful sets which make each episode so exciting and fresh.

Hi there.

"Yo. Wasn't expecting you to come by today."

I see you're building a kitchen. This wouldn't be for the Ratchet house, would it? The set you were supposed to have completed sometime in 2008?

"So we're a little behind schedule. Had to special order the door hinges and they sent the wrong kind and we had to yada yada...and then it was snowing, and you know we don't work in the snow..."

It doesn't snow in here. It's climate controlled. You have a roof over your head.

"Hey, the rules are the rules. You want to talk to my union rep?"

Frankly, I just want you to finish the kitchen. You're holding up the show. Say, who's your little apprentice? She's very photogenic.

"Who, me?"

Yes, you. Have you ever thought of going in front of the camera?"

"Who, me?"

Is there some other photogenic little apprentice in this room?

"Well, if you mean me...truth is, I never wanted to be anything but a master carpenter, have a layer of grime beneath my fingernails, a dent in my head where I hit it with the backswing of a hammer, and wear this big old leather holster with screwdrivers and drills and whatnot hanging out of it."

You never wanted to dress up in silk and diamonds, have people know your name wherever you go?

"Not really."

Most girls would jump at...wait a minute ! Wait a minute! Is that the built-in oven you're working on?

"Uh, ye-ah."

You know, I'm thinking it might work better on the other side of the kitchen.

"You're kidding me, right?"

Hardly. As you well know, I lack anything akin to a sense of humor.

Look, Lady, you wanna move the oven to the other side of the kitchen, you do it. I'm tired of this gig. I quit."

A little temperamental, aren't we?

"Maybe you haven't noticed, but we little people have feelings, too. You treat us like...like....playthings. Subject to your every whim."

Oh my gosh, do you really feel that way? I had no idea. I feel so...so insensitive. Thank you for calling it to my attention.

"You're toying with me, right?"

All I'm gonna say is, if you walk out on this job, you can kiss your acting career good-bye...come back here. Come back here! I'm talking to you! You'll be sorrrrry.

Come back....?